Replace Your Ego

Look at it this way, you have written to me and asked me a question, if I did not reply, you might ask again but would, eventually, give up if I did not reply.

It is similar with someone with whom you have a relationship with of some kind that is insulting or bullying you.
If you do not answer, the person would eventually realize that it is pointless insulting or bullying you because it does not provoke a response.
The subject is actually quite difficult to understand because it involves ego and the fight/flight part of our makeup.

If someone is insulting you, they do it in an attempt to demonstrate that they are stronger, more powerful, higher than you. If you reply angrily, you do it in an attempt to demonstrate to them that you are as strong as they are, not physically but emotionally, mentally, in a hierarchical sense.
You try to demonstrate that you are as powerful as them.
It is one ego battling with another ego, it is pointless.
It is like two dogs barking at each other.
But, if you just walk away, they have no one to bark at.

So, if you walk away and leave them on their own for a while and then later, perhaps, ask them if they want something in a calm manner, you will find that they will reply calmly.

Don’t forget, that they are bullying and insulting you because they feel uncertain as to their place in the relationship. The fact that you reject them makes them feel lost. They are actually trying to assess their place in the relationship, be it a coworker, friendship or family one.

You can gradually show them their place by being kind and gentle when you talk to them. That way they will not feel threatened.
Once they no longer feel their place in the relationship under attack, they will not need to try to make you feel small by insulting you.

It is up to you to control this dance.
They cannot do it because they are lost but you, thanks to the help we are giving you, should be able to see what is going on behind the scenes and control the way it all unfolds.

So, please realize that you must get your ego out of the way and that will allow them to get their ego out of the way, then there will be a place for love and harmony to come back in.
Ego is a massive problem and is the cause of much trouble in the world.
Ego and love cannot share the same place, it is one or the other.
You get your ego out of the way and they will get their ego out of the way also.
It will take time but will work.
You must replace your ego with calmness and with care, then they, not feeling threatened, will do the same.

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